something else happened to me today that was interesting...
when i spoke up in class, in the middle of my comment, the professor helped me realize a loose part of my thinking. When i spoke up again to clarify/fix what i was saying, i did what i thought to be a humble gesture by deferring to the wisdom of the prof [how unamerican! ;-)] and apologized for my muddled words before...
after the class, when i went to the front to follow up my point with the professor, a gentleman in the class took me aside for a moment and told me (in the manner of helpful and friendly advice) never to apologize in public.
i do not mean to imply that the gentleman who spoke to me was a bad man or anything of the sort. i appreciated that he cared enough for my wellbeing to speak to me. perhaps he was right, but the statement simply took me aback. i tend to be a direct person who will put his ideas out in the open without shame (i hope!), but i am coming to realize more and more that not everyone does that with such casual manner. many people, when they speak, are afraid of admitting culpability or fault. personally, i think i do not have such a problem with that because to me, they are just words, just ideas, and i would rather look a fool that continue to believe falsehoods. also, there are always more ideas where those came from.
word is truth.
peace,
~invisible
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2 comments:
He is wrong. If the offense was in public, and the apology is genuine, it should not be hidden.
If you erred in public, admit it in public.
The notion that you shouldn't apologize in public is predicated on the idea that "winning" or "losing" an argument, or "saving face", is more important than the process of debate itself and an honest search for answers.
Ain't no shame in apologizing.
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